Old home above and below in TX:
Local park below:
Kami was very much about giving another his undivided full presence. However COMMA whenever it was outdoor time (especially the local park) or snack time, it was as if he had severe ADHD—distracted by one too many shiny objects—and focus would go right out the window.
Kami and his first and last crush girl-friend, Cali (one of my husband’s friend/former soldier’s pet). Kami literally followed her around like a puppy dog, and even allowed her to eat from his bowl after she was done with hers (she ate A LOT). When she left for the day, he would sit by the front door for a couple of hours, as if to wait for her return like a loyal friend. While out in the backyard, he would run back and forth along the fence right behind her, and would very gently tap her butt every now and then; it was SO CUTE! Unfortunately for Kami, Cali often gave him THE PAW, her back, and/or ZERO attention, as if to telepathically communicate, “Boyyy, you need to calm your hyper self down. I don’t have time for BULLshit. And stop sniffin’ or touchin’ my @$$!”
Enchanted Rock below:
Note: Above are some photos of Kami and and our family. I’ve shared more photos in other posts (links shared in About page), to include a recently updated post titled, “Stories of a Black Stray Cat Named Shadow“. I put together a collection of Kami’s photos within a big frame for our home that includes Kami, Shadow, my husband and I, and our friends, but some are private since they include other than family. Videos will be added another time.
This post is technically late since Kami passed away November of last year; however, I trust that everything happens in Divine perfect timing and order for the highest benefit of interconnected Life/All That Is.
I also realize that I fully enjoy expressing myself via a public blog only when I truly feel like doing so. Otherwise, I’m not being authentic self.
Although I briefly mourned after Kami passed away, I think I may have suppressed some feelings of loss; afterall, he was my first pet.
The memories of him were so deeply ingrained that even after his death, I was often able to visualize him standing in front of me as clear as day.
He–like our current pet cat Shadow—had such deep, eye contact that seemed to touch the soul. I love him so much.
At times, I felt so regretful for not spending more quality time with him (i.e., the times where my husband and I watched TV while he was lying near the couch).
But I was reminded from within that spiraling down into the low energy vibration of regret—and being lost within the negative, bombarding thoughts of should’ve, could’ve, and would’ve—doesn’t benefit us at all, though it is important to take some time to embrace all of our raw emotions (our inner compass), and to honor all of our feelings (the language of the soul).
I also felt guilty at times for having been repulsed by the way Kami smelled after he spent some time outside.
It had nothing to do with getting enough baths I found out (after doing some research). I’ve read plenty of posts, articles, and comments within pet forums that other people were experiencing the unknown odor that made them react the same way.
If I recall correctly, it has to do with some chemical reaction that takes place when dogs go outside (a natural occurrence).
It’s just that my sense of smell has sharpened over the years, to include the ability to identify chemical odors within certain drinks and foods.
My other senses have sharpened as well—i.e., hearing various tones, to include musical ones; seeing movement of energy at times; sensing more strange to amazing energies, etc.—which is part of the ascension process that many on our planet are experiencing these days.
Just like the vibration of regret, similar low vibrations of guilt, and even shame, don’t benefit us if we become lost within them; so I made the intention to let those energies go as well, to be transmuted and integrated with Spirit.
Kami was beautiful inside and out. He was a great pet/dog/family member who was so lovable and unconditionally loving.
He never messed up our house—e.g., going through trashcans, knocking stuff over (though there were plenty of small to large things to knock over), digging holes through walls, etc.—never barked a lot, or was aggressive towards other animals or beings (to include humans).
He was such a free-spirit, which now makes sense why I had named him Kami, which means spirit of nature in Japanese, and o-kami means wolf (which he looked like).
I found out later from an unknown, older man who emailed me—after coming upon my blog—that kami also means gods. I also thought it was interesting that he sent me a brief, voice recording of how he felt about overall life; no one’s ever sent me something like that.
His very deep and somewhat monotone voice was unlike anything I’ve ever heard; it sounded ancient, full of suffering, and so familiar to my soul. I didn’t realize it then, but I now trust that he was mirroring back to me my own repressed and/or suppressed, inner suffering with overall life.
During his younger days, before and/or after performing some Japanese martial arts (forgot the name), the students (to include himself) and teacher used to bow to a kami statue.
This information helped me to further understand why I had a vivid dream years ago of my pet Kami being surrounded by orcas, who all faced him in a circle. Note: Story shared in post, “Adventures with Cetaceans in Dream State“
I was initially fearful that they might harm him, but they didn’t. I trust that they are Galactic family. So what did Kami and the orcas have in common?
They’re both black and white—which seems to symbolize the balance and harmony of Yin&Yang/Goddess&God—and are from Sirius A or B. In addition, Kami was like a wolf of the land, the orcas were like wolves of the sea.
I trust that the circle is symbolic of the Divine Feminine energy that is, at its highest state, Source/Very Holy Spirit/Prime Creator/Creator of All Creation: Crop Circle Code 6666/the Divine Mother Goddess; and Kami was symbolic of the Divine Masculine energy/gods birthed from the Great Mother (to include God—with a capital G—Her Twin Flame/the first split of the circle). Note: Also see post where the square within circle theme is present, “Dream of Pregnant Woman with Cube Belly and Smiling Child” (Goddess“A Crop Circle Symbolic of All of Life Birthed from Ancient Mother Goddess?”
I trust that the Kami and orcas dream was a message (and a soul reminder) from Spirit within of who the original Creator is, since there’s still confusion within the collective ego consciousness of humanity.
As shared in the About page—to include post, “Running with Bears and Dogs in Dream State“—Kami has appeared in other otherworldly dreams.
I have no doubt that he was one of my main spirit guides and/or guardian angel (his middle name, Tenshi, means angel). Once, I had another “nightmare” of my adoptive dad wanting to have sex with me.
I felt myself resisting him, and that’s when Kami showed up—the first time he showed up in the dimension of the dead within the astral world (since my dad had passed away of a heartattach in 2011 after much chaos in his life during that timeframe).
At some point, Kami and my dad ended up in a dark, narrow hallway right outside the tiny, dimly-lit room that I was in.
To my amazement, Kami was standing on his hind legs like a human; he had grown much taller and more muscular, and he started pushing my dad toward the left side of the hallway until they both disappeared.
Upon waking up, I felt so grateful that Kami was there for me when I was feeling so fearful and powerless. I was also reminded of ancient Egyptian Anubis.
I used to joke around with my husband about how Kami often sat exactly like the sphinx within the Giza Pyramids.
In another dream, I was looking for him in what appeared to be some tropical forest. Even though I had walked by a ginormous, colorful, parrot-like bird that was probably three times my size, it didn’t even faze me.
I continued to search for Kami, and when I found him, he was just casually sitting in the sphinx position with his long, saliva-dripping, granny titty-like tongue dangling from his opened mouth.
I don’t recall what happened after that, but the theme of me following him, and him guiding me, is also present in the dream recorded in post, “The Path of the Gentle Cow and Aggressive Tiger“.
There was only one other time that Kami showed up in a dream that was earthly rather than otherworldly, and that was when my mother was nagging at me in a little store, which stressed me out as usual, and I heard Kami continually barking out loud right outside the store’s main entrance. I ended up waking up.
It wasn’t the first time I had a sexual dream involving my father (who adopted me when I was three after marrying my biological, Korean mother).
I had a few other similar dreams. In one of them, I—a teenage version of self in a parallel reality/different home setting—felt scared that my mother was about to leave me home with my adoptive father, not aware that he had an ill intention (to have sex with me).
Upon waking up from the dream where Kami came to my rescue, I wondered if I (during childhood) had repressed some memory(ies) of my adoptive father trying to have sex with me, and/or actually having sex with me; but I don’t remember anything like that. The only times I ever felt very uncomfortable around my dad were the following:
- when I was in fifth or sixth grade, my dad was standing behind me, and he jokingly grabbed my boobs saying he wanted to see how much I grew. I don’t recall my mother being around, but I told him, “Ssstop!” in a whining tone. I shared this with a psychologist that I was seeing shortly after I left the Army life (in my late thirties), and she told me that wasn’t a normal or healthy action from a parent at all, and that it was actually disturbing. That was the first time I had ever shared that story with someone, and it was a such relief to hear another perspective. That was an experience that confused me since childhood, and I have no doubt that those feelings being deeply buried within wasn’t beneficial for me at all. However, the conclusion that I came to was that he—like some of my Korean relatives who were awkwardly very touchy and feely—was just being playful in a manner that general society deems unacceptable.
- In my early twenties, while returning from the bathroom in the middle of the night, I saw my dad just standing in the dark hallway naked and staring at me with an eerie smile, and I immediately looked away and rushed to the guest room. It was more awkward that traumatizing, and I was confused as to why he was acting that way. I was also relived that my step-mother at the time—my dad’s decade affair mistress turned third wife—wasn’t there to witness such a strange moment. My mother once told me a story in my adult years. She said that when I was around six years old, I ran into my parents in the hallway. My dad had just stepped out of the shower and then bathroom, and I apparently approached them and stared at his private area. My mother immediately told me to look away, but my dad told her that it’s okay, that I was just curious as a child. Conclusion: So when I was a child, I didn’t have a judgment toward my naked dad staring at me, or me staring at him; but as an adult, I did (due to society’s conditioning that it’s NOT okay for a grown child and parent of the opposite sex to be naked around one another). WOW, I feel so much lighter just by freely and authentically expressing my once, deeply buried thoughts and feelings.
I now trust that these sexual dreams were symbolic of the father/old patriarchal male energy aspect of self desiring to integrate with self as part of the whole Self. I recall that meaning from the Dream Moods dictionary—that I often use as a guidance tool, while trusting my inner guidance first and foremost.
A part of me felt deeply sad when Kami departed; however, another part of me was relieved, because I often wished for him to be more free—where as an indoor pet, his freedom was limited.
Ever since he transformed into another energy state, I sometimes imagine him freely running around in nature—within bright green fields full of colorful flowers, or within a thick blanket of snow (the natural environment of Siberian Huskies).
I also visualize him at times playing with his animal friends who are friendly, and even deeply bonding with a female husky. Kami passed away a virgin—a 42 year old virgin (in dog years) to be exact. 🙁
My husband and I were planning to eventually get him a mate, but our financial circumstance at the time didn’t allow for it.
We used to take him to the larger dog park, but after two, aggressive dogs attacked him, I no longer felt it was safe for him there.
I learned later that the male dogs being very aggressive towards him more than likely had to do with him no being neutered.
However, we chose not to because of two main reasons. I remembered the soulless look on my baby son’s face soon after the doctor had finished…I can’t even think of the word right now…wow…removing his foreskin off his penis [circumcising]. It was as if he was looking through me without blinking.
I felt so horrible and guilty for the longest time. But prior to making that decision, my first husband and I agreed that it was the best for our son due to hygiene reasons (at least that what people were convinced to do from those running society throughout human history).
But why would the foreskin exist if it had absolutely no purpose. Everything has a Divine purpose; and just because the so-called experts don’t know the answers, doesn’t mean something or someone doesn’t have one.
A great example is our DNA. Just because scientists back in the day didn’t know what the majority of it was, they named it “junk DNA”. However, it’s now becoming mainstream knowledge that the majority of our DNA is the once dormant spiritual DNA that’s gradually being activated.
Another reason why we chose to not neuter Kami is because we envisioned giving him the opportunity one day to have his own family, that included his partner and their puppies.
I’ve embraced that it wasn’t for our highest benefit to manifest such a reality on this particular physical Earth; but that’s okay, since I trust that he’s enjoying his new life elsewhere.
I’ve also wished for him to simply Be whoever his heart desired to be (and not limited to only being a dog) and to fully experience and enjoy in whatever reality(ies), dimension(s), and/or world (s).
In one of the recent posts, I shared a bizarre experience where a small bag lit up like crazy that was next to his urn; and the bag only lights up upon sensing movement. There were no visible movements that night.
I had a strong feeling that night that the energy/consciousness aspect of Self that is Kami (Ka also means soul or spirit), that felt very joyful, was saying, “Hello love! This is a reminder that all is well in our world.” I felt deeply grateful for his loving presence.
I may have more to share some other time, which I will add updates to within this post; but for now, I’ll complete this post with this message:
Kami—who will always be in our hearts—THANK YOU SO MUCH for your amazing existence within many realities of the multidimensional Universe(s)—especially this particular physical, Earth reality within this lifetime—and for gifting all of us who had the opportunity to bask in your very lovable and loving presence.
Even Shadow, out pet cat, showed deep compassion for Kami when he wasn’t feeling aweful the day of his death. She gently low-crawled towards him, which I trust was her loving way of comforting him.
WE LOVE YOU FOREVER KAMI. Continue to Be Free Spirit!!! ^_^